There’s Nothing Easy About Living

Cleaning out an old clinic cabinet yesterday I ran across this “blast from the past”.

Wow. That’s just way too many mixed messages on one glossy piece of paper.

Meanwhile, here is a photo that depicts how I am feeling about living today.

Although I avoid dwelling on this side of myself, I trust that every one of you can relate. Because we are humans living on an earth filled with pain, heartache, chaos and injustice.

• Being “beautiful” doesn’t make life easy.
• Working hard doesn’t make life easy.
• Being a good person doesn’t make life easy
• Having more shoes doesn’t make life easy.
• Praying doesn’t make life easy.
• (Insert-Here____________) doesn’t make life easy.

Reading glossy magazines that tell you how other people live “easy” definitely DOES NOT make life easy.

Bottom line, no one is immune to struggle, sadness, trouble and hurt.

Oh, how wonderful it would be if our lives were really as smooth and happy as we make it look on our social media accounts! Reality is messier, uncomfortable, hard to look at. In fact, I’ve observed that often the happiest, prettiest, carefree-est looking media accounts can actually be the ones with the most pain behind them.

Just a thought I’ve had today.

I’ve heard that we “must experience pain” so we are reminded how to be kinder and more compassionate humans. I don’t know if that is ‘fact’ or not. However, it is true that some of the very best people I’ve ever known have been the ones carrying the heaviest loads.

Does it really have to get to that point for us to choose to be a kinder person?

Our social media tends to only show our ‘shiney sides’. Smiling faces, happy families, beautiful places, exciting travel adventures, joyful celebrations… Blessedly, life DOES offer us all of those things as “reprieves” … however, real day to day living is filled with hard work, struggle, problems, exhaustion, illness, heart aches, confusion, even crises. It seems like it has become a taboo to even mention these, which leads to feeling isolated in the middle of a “virtual crowd”.

It’s not a simple choice to share a burden publicly. There’s a lot of fear. We don’t want to share our most vulnerable pieces of our heart only to receive terse opinions, sound-bite problem solving, or worse – judgement.

And so, we remain silent.

We retreat and hide what’s inside – when what we need most is just someone to sit beside us with empathy, and acknowledge our pain.

I’m not looking for pity today, nor am I seeking any ‘fixing’. I guess what I’m trying to express is acknowledging we usually only see the shell of reality. So, if there is anyone else feeling isolated today, and weighed down, I’m with you. Today, I’m not even able to push my load up the hill. I’m just holding on and trying to keep it from rolling back and crushing me.

Some days are like this.

Tomorrow will be another day. Maybe it will be harder, or the same. Maybe it will be a little better. I feel sad that many of you are going through something similar. If you aren’t, then embrace the day, knowing that your turn will come. No one’s life is perfect, shiny and worry free. No one is “living the dream” (whatever ‘the dream’ looks like).

I think we are simply living day to day. Hoping some day it will all make sense and our effort to hold on, swim upstream, pray and strive, will all mean something.

Perhaps today we can try doing a little more listening and a little less ‘fixing’. Perhaps we can allow ourselves to acknowledge that sometimes life just completely sucks. It isn’t fair, isn’t fun, and isn’t nice. It’s OK to cry. I desperately hope that you have someone else willing to cry with you, and encourage you to hang on. Because YOU matter. I don’t want you to feel alone today.

I’m sorry that I cannot take the burdens away that you and I are carrying. The struggle is real. I can’t tell you why, but I believe deep down the struggle is worth it. My faith has taught me this mantra my whole life. I have no reason to not believe it. There is a higher purpose to our lives. Because despite everything, life is beautiful. There is joy. There is hope. There will be better days. I don’t know why it all has to be so difficult and overwhelming, but someday I trust we will get to see the big picture.

If everyone in the world chose to be kind, loving and patient, it probably would be a perfect world.

Sadly, that isn’t going to happen – there are too many people choosing to be terrible humans. The way I see this, I cannot change them – but, I don’t have to contribute to the problem.

So, let’s be kind today. Choose to be kind to someone else because they are holding onto a burden you cannot see. Choose to be kind to yourself because you are doing the best that you can. Keep holding on. You are amazing, and because of you, there is hope in this world. It’s going to be okay. There is no such thing as “easy living” but there is such a thing as Good Living.

There are more good things to come!

¡Buen Camino!  – Holly